His Banana

by Penelope Bloom

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My new boss likes rules, but there's one nobody dares to break...
No touching his banana.
Seriously. The guy is like a potassium addict.
Enter me. Hopeful intern with no idea about the rules.
Of course, I touched it. If you want to get technical, I actually put it in my mouth.
Want more dirty details?
I chewed it up, too... I even swallowed.
I know. Bad, bad, girl.
Then I saw him, and believe it or not, choking on a guy's banana does not make the best first impression.

I was only there in the first place to write a story. My real job was as a reporter. Though, I guess calling myself a reporter is kind of like calling a rent-a-cop a "security enforcement specialist". Strictly speaking, I wrote throwaway pieces on businesses nobody cared about or wanted to read about. But infiltrating Galleon Enterprises to investigate Bruce Chamberson was my big break.

Forget the fact that he looked like somebody carved him out of liquid female desire and sprinkled on some "makes men question their sexuality" for good measure. Landing the internship with Bruce was my chance for something better, and I was going to do everything in my power to keep from screwing it up.

Fast forward to the conference room before the interview, and that's where you would find me with a banana in my hand. A banana that literally had his name on it in big, black sharpie. It was a few seconds later when he walked in and caught me yellow-handed. A few seconds after that was when he hired me.

Yeah. I know. It didn't seem like a good sign to me, either.